Counselling and Personal Development
Student Life
It is a rare person who is completely happy with how they look.
Millions of people throughout the western world find eating stressful and feel guilt- ridden about food. Many more hate their bodies and the way they look.
Being exposed to a steady diet (just can’t escape that word!) of ‘perfect bodies’ through the media magnifies this. Knowing that this perfection has been created through surgery, starvation, drugs, make-up tricks, airbrushing, lighting and camera magic does not always help those sitting at home reading the magazines.
Food is obviously about a lot more than just nutrition. Eating can be an intensely pleasurable experience. It is associated throughout history and in all cultures with celebration and hospitality.
But for many people, eating food, especially ‘fattening’ foods, feels scary and dangerous. Eating is accompanied by feelings of guilt and remorse. Social events involving eating can be torture.
What is an eating disorder?
Eating is defined as ‘disordered’ when we turn to food (or away from it) as a way to cope with problems. For instance, when food or dieting is frequently used to deal with loneliness or anxiety, eating is disordered.
‘Eating Disorders’ are a serious form of ‘disordered eating’ which can lead to very serious health problems.
Anorexia and bulimia are virtually unknown in less industrialised countries, while in our society it is estimated that 10% of young women suffer from an eating disorder. In highly industrialised countries where food is plentiful but our relationship to it so complex, it is not hard to argue that some degree of ‘disordered eating’ is the norm rather than the exception.
While an uneasy relationship with food may not be life threatening, it is very often threatening to our quality of life..
The Mental Trap
The mental trap is built of ‘shoulds’, fashioned out of idealised images bearing little resemblance to real human beings. Failure to comply with these unrealistic images feels like personal failure.
When we are inside the trap, we see the world distorted by its bars.
Kristen has just pigged out on a family block of chocolate and a packet of Tim Tams. She berates herself with feelings of hopelessness and tells herself that she ‘always’ does this.
Every time he is going to a big party, Tim tries to squeeze into a pair of leather pants he wore when he was 16. They haven’t fitted since then, but he keeps them to motivate himself to get skinny again.
Nicola, who sees herself as weak and lazy, says “I’ve got no willpower so it’s pointless me joining anything - I never end up going”. This is despite the fact that during a 3 month trial at the local gym, she had gone twice a week – more exercise than she had been getting but not the daily attendance she had planned.
Rachel is becoming quite isolated because she avoids going out to have a pizza with friends in case they see she is uncomfortable eating what she thinks is fattening food. She is very embarrassed about feeling this way and imagines that no one else does.
Leanne, who is rather shy and curvaceous, tells herself that no guy will be interested in her unless she is outgoing and petite. Although current fashions in beauty stress skinniness, guys often prefer voluptuous women. Many of her friends are happy with themselves and their relationships without being stick thin and the life of the party
How “disordered” is your eating? Should you be worried? Answer these simple questions as a key to discovering how you really feel.
Quick tips
Feeling happy and relaxed with your body and with food begins with learning to be kind to yourself.
Taking it further
Getting help (Note - Links open in a new window)
